Sunday, April 5, 2009

Threeasaurus Rex

January 14, 2008. That is the day Bunny turned two. I braced myself for the toddler maelstrom that was to follow. I looked at my sweet baby and wondered when she would turn into a terrible tyrant, when would she start throwing tantrums, when would she become TWO.

I waited and I watched. January became February, winter became spring, became summer became fall and finally winter again. And it never came. Not that there weren't the occasional outbursts, there were. But the terrible part never came.

And I wondered why. Was it because she was so verbal that she had the ability to make her feelings known? Was it because she was so sweet natured that terrible was beyond her comprehension? Was it because she was so curious about the way things worked that she figured it out on her own?

Or was it because, as some people told me, three is much worse than two?

Well January 14th rolled around again. January became February became March and there were no problems. Maybe, just maybe we would luck out. Maybe we would not be the parents of a Tyrannosaurus Rex of a three year old.

Well I was wrong. I just learned that it is really difficult to be three years old.

As she loves to tell me, Bunny is not a baby. But she is also not a big girl. There are things she can do all by herself and there are things she can't. There are things that she wants me to do for her and there are things that she wants to do by herself. But her ability does not always match her desire. She wants independance and control. But she also wants the security of knowing that Mommy and Daddy are around, just in case.

She wants to try out her new found abilities, exactly when she wants to whether or not its appropriate. Running becomes running away from you. Jumping becomes jumping off of things way, way too high.

There are days when her ears appear to have fallen off. No matter how many times you repeat yourself, the message does not sink in. Days when you are hoarse from trying to get her to listen when you are only met with a "Huh?" and a turn of the head. "Why don't you listen Bunny?" "Because listening is no fun, momma."

Slights, real and perceived, can result in uncontrollable sobbing. "Why did you put baby allosaurus in the dino cave?" Toys that cannot be found in 2 seconds must have been deliberately hidden by a parent. "Momma where did you put parrot? You hid him from me."

Opinions are exerted more forcefully. A simple no becomes "NO!!!!" accompanied by stomping of the feet.

In other words Bunny is behaving in a completely normal, age appropriate way. And mommy is left trying to figure out how to deal with this new Threeasaurus Rex.


xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx said...

Oh thank god it's not just me.

I'm sorry, that's insensitive. Let me try again.

Oh thank god it's not just me.

Sorry, can't get past that. :)

I hear you, mama. We're going through the same thing. A few weeks ago, she pulled a complete 180, and there are times I hardly recognize my little girl through the screaming, tantrums and downright conniving antics.

Just wait til they're teenagers!

... we're doomed.

Kate Coveny Hood said...

I didn't think two was that bad either (with Oliver) and THEN the twins turned two. I can't even imagine what they'll be like at three. And Eleanor is by far the worst of the two. I think girls must have an extra drama chip.

All we can do is have a good sense of humor and live for the smiles.

Christy said...

Well I don't have an iota of advice because my daughter is still a baby, not able to speak back or speak at all frankly. I can say that my brother and wife told me three was worse than two with both of their kids. Doesn't make it any easier, I know. But somehow, it kind of does, doesn't it? )Like - I know I feel better knowing that there are lots of other huffing and puffing their way through the 30 day shred with me!)

Good luck with her tantrums and backtalk - I'm sure you'll make it!

ConverseMomma said...

I am having such a hard time with my son, right now. He is just about to turn three. I feel this post. I understand this post. He straddles this line and he wants to be independent but sometimes his independence. I sometimes wonder if I am not screwing it all up. Glad to hear that others struggle a bit too.

FranticMommy said...

I feel your pain Mommy! Both my rugrats were far worse in their three's than in their two's. Our son's "ears fell off" at three and have yet to re-attatch (he's 6). Our daughter (who's now in her terrible three's) used to be referred to as "Sweet Baby", is now know as "Destructo Baby" (or as my hubby says "the naughty bugger wearing a diaper). This too shall pass...I hope!

Anonymous said...

If it's any comfort, it gets better for a few years from 6 to at least where we are now -- 8. But 3 was definitely not fun.