Soundtrack

I'll admit it, silence kind of scares me. Silence is big and empty. It makes me feel alone.

I've always liked noise, not volume but noise. Voices talking, music, the humming of appliances are soothing sounds for me. Noise isn't distracting to me, instead it helps me focus.

When I lived alone, I always had noise. The television and the radio were my friends. I would turn them on when I got home and go about my business. I even studied with noise in the background.

These days, I have a constant soundtrack playing in my house. It is what happens when you live with a four year old. Constant questions, talking at the speed of light.

But my favorite tracks in the soundtrack are those that play in the quiet times, the times when she is not engaging me.

As she sits at her table to draw, she hums or sings quietly to herself. Twinkle, Twinkle. The Wheels on the Bus. Bingo. Melodies of her own invention.

As she plays with her horses, or lizards, or birds, or dinosaurs, she will narrate the action. "No baby lizard, don't go over there. Stay here with your mama." "Machine, you should go get some food for your babies, they are hungry." "Run the big T-Rex is coming. He's gonna eat you."

These are the sounds of Bunny at play. These are the sounds that soothe me.