Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Shoo

We have an unwanted visitor in our home that is slowly driving us all insane. A fly has found its way inside and has been tormenting us all for the past few days.

As I may have mentioned before I am not a fan of bugs. And my budding entimologist hates flying insects. So it hasn't been fun.

At any given moment during the day you are likely to stumble upon the following scene in our house:

"Momma a fly. I don't like flies. Go away fly." While uttering these words Bunny will sprint towards me grab my leg and bury her head into my knee. Of course I am clutching a rolled up magazine looking to go all Carl Spackler on the fly. So there I am hunting the fly with a crazed wild look in my eyes while dragging a 30 lb. toddler on my leg.

Needless to say that doesn't work. The fly continues to buzz happily around our house while "I'm All Right" plays in the background.

Hoping that a different tactic would work, Bubs got all zen like a Fly Whisperer this morning. He tracked the fly to the back stairway. He calmly asked the fly to fly closer to the door. "I'm going to open the door and you are going to fly outside," he told the fly, expecting it to listen.

It did not listen. Why would it want to go outside into the cold when it could stay in our nice warm house.

The cats are no help either. When they were younger, they would have at least tried to catch the fly. There would have been flying leaps off of furniture at the fly. You would have seen them standing on their hind paws stretching up to pluck the fly out of the air. But alas they are in their golden years and they are content to lay in front of the heater curled in a ball while the fly buzzes around their ears.

So now I am developing a nervous tic. I imagine the fly is everywhere. I can hear his buzzing but I cannot catch him. Bunny is no better. She stops what she is doing every so often to scream "go away fly" and duck her head.

Go away indeed. We can't take much more of this.

Note: That sound of manical laughter you hear is me. The fly is no more. Ding dong the fly is dead.

7 comments:

Karen said...

You need to invest in a bug vaccuum and then sneak up on the pesky guy and suck him up...

Kate Coveny Hood said...

First - This is hilarious and the Caddy Shack reference is priceless.

Second - I've been there before and tried that "Fly Whisperer" approach. A fly trap that entails jelly on a plate and a cup? Doesn't work.

Last - I didn't know that flies lived that long. Either it will die soon and put you out of your misery or you may have to consider the fact that you have a second fly in the house.

Bonus - I totally want a bug vacuum. Wher do I find one of those??

MamaCarter said...

ROFLMAO.

Remember dust busters? They work great to suck unsuspecting flies up. Course, then they rattle around in there until they die of starvation which is a bit....gross. But still, they work wonders!

(do they still sell dust busters??)

iMommy said...

You're right, they are soooo annoying!

anymommy said...

And no one mourned his passing!

bernthis said...

I have one word for you: SWATTER! Gets the sucker every time. I'm still amazed at how something that costs to little and seems so flimsy can do its job perfectly. Best investment you'll ever make.

Jen said...

Definitely annoying...plus my kids obsess about the fly whenever one is in our house. Which is also annoying.